Everyone Fecked Off To Twitter So I Started A Blog

Jewish & Democratic or Democratic & Jewish?

2010-10-12T04:39:00.003+02:00

At the end of the tortuous bureaucratic nightmare of acquiring Israeli citizenship, I signed a declaration swearing loyalty to the State of Israel.

These days, things are getting a little more complicated. A recent cabinet decision means that anyone gaining citizenship will now have to declare loyalty to the Jewish and Democratic State of Israel. While I'm not Jewish, I'd have no issue in signing the declaration . This is after all the homeland of the Jewish people, and I don't feel it hurts me in any way to acknowledge that.

However, if an Arab Israeli citizen marries a foreigner - say from Jordan or wherever - their new partner would have to declare loyalty to the "Jewish and Democratic". Given the sorry history of the past 100 years, that may be a bit hard to swallow. Since the Arab population makes up around 20% of the total, "80% Jewish and 100% Democratic" might be a better formulation. Although I'm not entirely sure about the 100% Democratic either...

So why now? Why has our beloved government chosen this particular moment to introduce a change that seems solely designed to irritate 20% of the country? Maybe it was a sop to the Yisrael Beitenu party so they'll wave through a mooted 2 month extension to the building freeze? We'll just have to wait and see.

Back on the chain gang

2010-07-26T11:37:00.002+03:00

Had a wonderful time in the UK. The twins greatly enjoyed themselves, and therefore so did their parents ;)

To our Chinese friends: I'm aware that you get paid for each spam comment you leave on this blog, but I don't believe that anyone apart from me actually reads it, and nobody will ever follow the links you leave. So please - do me a favour, and don't bother posting.

Thissenthat

2010-06-21T15:24:00.002+03:00

Through a combination of diet and busting my ass off in an overpriced gym, err... health club, I've dropped from 99.9 to 87.8 kilos. Unfortunately I seem to be stuck at that point. The initial target is 87, and the dietician wants me to get to 82 sooner rather than later. So I need to get back on track with the diet, and not nibble the icing off my wife's cakes while she's not looking. And bust my ass even harder. Sigh...

Having lost all the weight hasn't done anything to improve my blood pressure. I saw a specialist who gave me a bunch of tests and a different sort of pill, which makes me need to pee at unearthly hours of the morning. Usually I can't get back to sleep afterwards, which means I've been somewhat tired of late. At the second appointment with said specialist, he didn't relate at all to the test results, and told me to keep taking the pills and come back in a few weeks. I rather imagine he wanted to go home early.

We're heading off to the UK (me, missus and twins) next month. Always a joy travelling with them, 'cos ya just don't know whether they're going to erupt into a bout of screaming over something that appears entirely trivial to any sane person, but is obviously of Earth-Shattering Importance to a 3.5-year old. Heard of the Terrible Twos? Yep, it appears that it continues into the Terrible Threes. Ominously, friends at work assure me that it continues into the Flippin' Awful Fours. The flipside of course is that they're so funny, the hugs, being told that Only Daddy Can Fix this broken toy, the sheer delight at dressing up as princesses (them, not me...).

Time Out

2010-03-19T19:34:00.002+02:00

Quite busy for the last month or so. The Day Job sent me to Atlanta for a week - where it was incredibly cold. I'm not really used to -4c temperatures any more. There's an ornamental fountation outside our offices there and we watched in fascination as it froze up during the day.

Earlier this week, the entire company descended on Tel Aviv for the first ever all-company meeting. Almost 200 people came over from the US and UK, and were joined by another 200 from the offices here. For the vast majority of the visitors this was their first time in Israel, and from what I gather they really enjoyed the experience.

Now I'm deeply enjoying the backlog of work that accumulated during the three days of the conference...

If you're in Israel and do Christmas...

2009-12-24T14:03:00.003+02:00

then I warmly recommend the Christmas Eve service at Immanuel Church on Beer Hoffman St in Yaffo. You can't miss it - it's that church-like building with a tower, and all. There is a parking lot on Eliphelet.

The service starts at 19:00, and is in English with Hebrew translation. After the service, Christmas refreshments are served in the Congregation House at the other end of the street.

Is that the time already?

2009-11-27T15:24:00.005+02:00

I joined a gym a few weeks ago. I am decidedly not the sort of person that joins a gym, but desperately needed something that would give me some exercise. The gym is both (a) painfully expensive and (b) located in the same building as The Day Job. Both these factors make it easier to attend regularly. I'm managing to maintain a 3 times a week schedule. Let's hope it continues. I do actually come away feeling better each time. Amazing.

I have an automated radio station at Radionomy. It's kind of in its infancy, but has on occasion come up with excellent tracks that I wasn't familiar with. You could call the format "eclectic", for want of a better term. There is a mixture of classic rock/AC/alternative, and a few Hebrew songs thrown in for good measure. I also included a daily reggae hour. For some obscure reason, the Radionomy system likes to bung in French songs from time to time. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but they don't really "fit" with anything else.

You can find a player over on the right. Let me know what you think.

Gute shabbes!

Voices of Peace

2009-11-09T13:49:00.003+02:00

Well, there now appear to be not one, but two reincarnations of the Voice of Peace.

Radius 100FM continues with the daily show at 18:00 Sun-Thurs & Sat. Listen at 100FM or http://www.100fm.co.il. It's now been joined by a 24/7 Internet station at http://www.thevoiceofpeace.co.il. Far be it from me to suggest which is the best (ahem...) but in any case, you now have more opportunities to indulge in a little nostalgia for what was a much-loved pirate station from 1973-1993.

Back to reality

2009-09-01T13:10:00.001+03:00

Last week I attended the ceremony to mark a year since Abie Nathan passed away.

After that we spent a very pleasant few days at Ein Gev on the shore of Lake Kinneret (Galilee). The girls loved the fresh air and simply being in a different environment for a while.

Today they started back at kindergarten in the group for "older" toddlers. They seem to get on very well with their new teacher. Plenty of hugs and no tears, fortunately.

Oh yeah, and I'm back at work. Sigh...

Floored

2009-08-16T14:24:00.003+03:00

My dear wife wants to replace our traditional Israeli floor tiles with new "keramika" ones. This is apparently going to cost us several arms and legs. Just curious if anyone reading this has any recommendations for people to do this...

Otherwise, hot hot hot... waiting for the summer to end. The twins are in keitana until the 21st, and we'll be taking a few days at the holiday village at Ein Gev at the end of the month.

Looking forward to the first rains... :)

Keeping it in the family

2009-06-13T15:51:00.003+03:00

I just added a new blog to the list on the right - it's the official blog of Mrs Tim, "Cakes & All That Is Fattening" (Hebrew only, sorry). In any event there isn't much text, but some darned fine photos of her cakes. She's happy to take orders (in Hebrew or English), so if you have a birthday, wedding or bar mitzva coming up, just drop an email to her or leave a comment on the blog. Be'teyavon.

Exercise is good for you

2009-06-02T08:29:00.005+03:00

The day started off overcast and misty. Today is the day of the Largest Ever Civil Defence Exercise In Israel - or at least the day when the public gets to participate in the fun.

At 11am there'll be an air-raid siren, at which point everyone is supposed to flee to their nearest shelter. The building where I work has two "protected space" rooms on each floor, equipped with blast doors, air filters and so on. Unfortunately, on my floor, one of these rooms is crammed to the gills with broken office furniture, and the other will hold 20, maybe 30 people with a push, Tokyo subway-style. Lemme see, how many people work on my floor - about 70-80.

Additionally, the Home Front Command instructions don't explain when you are allowed to come out of the shelter. Details here in English for the curious. They sent a cute little card to each home in the country, with a map indicating the warning time for each region. This ranges from 3 minutes around the Jerusalem area, 2 minutes on the coastal plain, "immediately" on the border with Lebanon (Hizbollah rockets), and 30 seconds for the communities surrounding Gaza (Hamas rockets). The map is surrounded by little dolphins, camels and boats, to offer some warm semblance of normality.

Some bigwig from the HFC was on the radio yesterday explaining that the army will do its utmost to ensure that the exercise doesn't turn into a real crisis. Gee thanks...

It turns out that our company isn't participating in the exercise. We're just far too busy doing whatever it is that we do.

If I knew you were coming I'd have baked a cake

2009-05-24T22:33:00.004+03:00

Our 11th wedding anniversary approaches. I've been looking for one of those fancy industrial-style mixers (Kenwood or Kitchenaid) for the missus. Don't worry dear reader, (a) this is something she really really wants - and quite possibly needs, and (b) the chances of her reading this are slim to none...

I saw one online at the website for Big Bucks, at a price that was ok-ish, comfortable payments, proper guarantee etc, and decided to go and pick one up from our local branch. I'd sort of assumed that the machine would cost a bit more in the shop, but "a bit" turned out to be 500 shekels. Eleven long years in this fair land have taught me some valuable lessons in the art of Not Being A Freier, especially not to the tune of 500 shekels, so I'm busy looking for Plan B. I've seen some nice ironing boards around...

Disclaimer: the bit about the ironing board was intended for humorous effect only, and should not be construed as accurately or otherwise depicting the relationship between Tim and/or Mrs Tim, or not as the case may be, hereinafterforetoward referred to as the Disclaimer.

Addendum: Mrs Tim has no idea what an iron is for, and Tim only does the ironing (a) in the winter and (b) when he can be bothered - i.e. effectively never)

Useful Tip: How to spot Tim - large number of tattoos, and badly creased shirts.

Voice. Over.

2009-05-22T21:28:00.002+03:00

I occasionally get to do voiceover work (and would love to do more, as it usually offers quite good money for incredibly little effort).

This clip really struck a chord with me, having been more than once stuck in a recording booth listening to the wisdom of some bloke who has no idea at all what he wants, other than he doesn't want it to sound the way I'm doing it. William Shatner is king! Go Bill! Take 2!!

Back on the Moxypen

2009-05-22T19:58:00.004+03:00

No, not me. Twin #1. She spent most of last year having recurring ear infections. On several occasions her eardrums actually burst. Prior to each event, she was in incredible pain from the fluid buildup. So we finally decided to put her through the operation to fit grommets in the eardrums. No parent wants a very small child to go through an operation under general anaesthetic, however light. On the other hand, it was hard seeing her in such pain, and needing a long potent course of antibiotics each time...

So for the last 6 months or so since the op, she's been absolutely fine. She started walking, and her speech improved dramatically. It's actually quite hard to get her to stop talking. Ah yes, she'll grow into a fine Israeli gal :)

Anyway, we thought the problems had come back yesterday, but the doctor said that the infections can still occur even with the grommets. It's just that they don't become so painful, with a high fever etc, and the fluids drain away rather than build up inside the ear. So the little 'un is now on a short course of Moxypen, which will hopefully clear up the problem.

Forty-Two

2009-05-19T17:17:00.002+03:00

I have to admit that the Wolfram Alpha thing is quite impressive.

It isn't the answer to Life, The Universe, and Everything
It isn't Google
It isn't Wikipedia
It isn't really a search engine either, although you can sort-of use it as such

What it does do nicely is computation - mathematic formulas, comparison of statistics and so on.

As a trivial example, type in "weather tel aviv", and it returns in detail, not just the current state, but historical graphs and data.

Now try "us israel population" and you'll see some quite interesting comparisons of population data - not least that average life expectancy is better here in the "Holy" land.

Have a look at the box on the right hand side of their front page "New to WolframAlpha" and you'll see some more possibilities.

You do have to phrase your inquiry quite carefully, and there are some things that I'd expect it to know, but baffle the system completely. But I think this is certainly one to watch. I only wish it had been around when I was in high school. We were bloody lucky to have these new-fangled e-lec-tronic calculators when I were a lad...

I'm not well

2009-05-16T21:33:00.002+03:00

Nothing serious. Just the usual colds that crop up around this time of year. Either I pick 'em up from work, or (more likely) the twins get 'em from kindergarten. The bug will then hop from twin to twin to Tim to Mrs Tim, and back round again until it gets bored.

So, as mentioned, it's that time of year, when Someone flips the switch, and the central coastal area of Israel is transformed from being pleasantly sunny and warm, to being unpleasantly hot and humid. It will mostly likely stay hot and humid until October-ish. I occasionally toy with the thought of moving somewhere a good deal drier - like Jerusalem or Eilat. In the end, the sheer convenience of the central area keeps me here - the opportunities for gainful employment are better, and it's nice to be close to the sea.

Nigel wants to go and see Depeche Mode

2009-05-12T12:19:00.004+03:00

Thus spake Attila the Stockbroker. Unfortunately Tim didn't get to go and see Depeche Mode.

Being in the radio biz (marginally), I sometimes get free tickets for gigs (examples: Tina Turner, The Australian Pink Floyd - who are actually very very very good), but this time I failed dismally. I also failed to get free tix for Paul McCartney. Sigh... *

Apparently the DM were very good - you can read Ashley's review and watch a clip.

It seems you can take in cameras to gigs nowadays. Maybe this is an Israeli thing. I recall the last time I went to a gig in the UK (Status Quo, if you must ask... my ex was crazy about them. Honest.) you weren't allowed to take in cameras, cassette recorders etc - presumably for fear of bootlegging. I guess these days the bands regard any free publicity as being a Good Thing.

* I also occasionally get free vouchers for Glida Frutti and Beit HaPancake (HaMekori). Not quite compensation for missing Depeche Mode or Paul McCartney, but hey...

The trouble with Israel

2009-05-09T22:10:00.002+03:00

Have a read of this article which nicely explains why Israel is perceived as a pariah, while some other states, rather more deserving of the title - are not.

Have a read through the talkbacks at the end of the article, and despair...

Fortunately the world is not run according to the whims of talkbackers, otherwise we'd all be stringing each other up from lampposts.

Taken, but not stirred

2009-05-08T17:50:00.003+03:00

I watched Taken with Liam Neeson. Fortunately it was a freebie on VOD.

Liam's acting was probably the best part of the movie, but the poor sod didn't have a whole lot to work with.

I won't share too much of the plot, and really there isn't too much to share. Basically Liam runs around Paris offing large numbers of Albanians and a few Arabs. Anyone with stagey foreign accent will do nicely.

I lost track of the body count at some stage, but take it from me there were a lot. Avoid, unless you like shoot-em-up type movies with minimal plot.

Blogblah

2009-05-06T17:55:00.001+03:00

If you're interested in knowing more about Israel, have a look in my Profile (over on the right). There is a list of exceptionally fine blogs there - all are recommended. This is a fascinating country that gets a shockingly bad press sometimes - mostly from people with limited knowledge of the place, or ill-formed preconceptions.

HDL LDL TC DDT MP NBG

2009-05-02T22:04:00.000+03:00

Been feeling crap of late (a number of tedious symptoms that I won't go into). The doctor gave me a fairly comprehensive set of blood tests in order to narrow down the cause. The only concrete thing I can see is that my HDL ("good" cholesterol) and total cholesterol are low.

Also my neutrophils are high as a percentage, and lymphocytes are low. I have no idea what this means other than that my body is fighting off some kind of infection. All the other factors she tested for are within the usual ranges. The doctor will hopefully have a better idea of what's going on when I see her tomorrow morning.

Ah, the joys of middle-agedness. I was reflecting with an old friend the other day, that when we first met back in the mid-80s our sole concerns were getting laid and where was the coolest bar.
Nowadays we spend most of our time discussing hereditary diseases and blood pressure medication.

I've just invented a new word, "nymphocytes", which sounds a good deal more entertaining than lymphocytes.

In other health noooooz, the pig flu panic seems to be dissipating. All in all, it was a bit of a damp squib, unless you happen to be one of the 150+ people killed by the disease. Here in Israel, we must apparently call it Mexican Flu, according to the deputy health minister (who is ultra-Orthodox). This edict is being widely ignored by the media.

Suddenly April Was Over

2009-05-01T21:22:00.000+03:00

I noticed a message taped to a lamp post in Kfar Saba that simply said Happy May Day. Ah yes, May Day - socialism still lives on in someone's heart!

Given the current economic situation, with all the cash injections, kick-starts, stimulii, whatever, it seems that socialism is making a comeback. It's suddenly ok for governments to Do Something For The People, rather than flog off publicly-owned utilities and enterprises to the highest bidder. Sadly, I think this phase will pass. Once economies start to stabilise, and the rich resume their ever onwards pursuit of becoming even richer, I'm sure that Big Government will once again be regarded as a Bad Thing.

Incidentally, I have zero problem with people being rich - as long as it's genuinely through the fruits of their labour, rather from screwing the less-rich, or from dodgy tax 'avoidance' schemes and the like. And if you're truly rich (in financial terms, let's not touch on spiritual richness just yet), then consider yourself lucky, and pay up the taxes of your country - and stop moaning about it.

There's some kerfuffle in my country of birth (the UK) because people earning over 150,000 pounds a year will have to pay a marginal tax rate of 50% in future. Note - that doesn't mean 50% of their earnings. It simply means that the top chunk of their earnings over a certain level will be taxed at 50%.

The usual whingeing has started: it will drive away talented people, disincentivise people from working hard etc etc. That's fecking bullshit. If someone chooses to leave the UK because of the tax rate, more fool them. Frankly the top earners in the UK financial sector didn't turn out to be particularly talented in any case. Let them take their ineptitude somewhere else. There are plenty of more talented, lower paid people who would love the chance to take up the reins of running companies and organisations.

I well recall the captains of the newly privatised utilities racking up huge pay increases for themselves, on the basis that "we need to retain the best talent" and "these salaries are in line with those paid in the US". Well, get this. The UK is definitely not the US. It's a smaller country, with a population one twentieth that of the States. Lordy, why did we have to blindly follow the Americans?

Everyone Fecked Off To Twitter So I Started A Blog

2009-05-01T20:54:00.001+03:00

And here it is.

The hardest part is choosing the domain name. Interestingly enough "fecking.blogspot.com" was free, there remains a chance that I'd have to explain it to some elderly person, and I really don't have the emotional energy for that.

So, here we are. I'll fill in the useful biographic details fairly shortly, but suffice it to say, that (in no particular order) I'm middle-aged, ex-pirate, tattooed, Christian, father of twins, working for an American SaaS company in Israel (no, you'll have to Google that, it's really not interesting), and to maintain my sanity I host two one-hour oldies shows on our local commercial radio station.

More anon.